The Best Laid Plans
It’s what I’ve been wanting, what I’ve been hoping for, what I’ve been working towards. I’m a traditional girl (in some few, select ways,) and I’m pleased to pieces that my life is finally coming together the way I’ve always wanted. I have the husband, we’re looking for the house, then we start the family. It’s all going to be perfect. We’ve gone to the credit union, we got the pre-approval for the mortgage, it is certainly a buyers’ market (and then some.) Everything is perfect.
Except that today, my beloved husband got laid off. Again. He’d gone back to work as a contractor at Idiots Becoming Managers when they came crawling back to him, and now that things were finally beginning to feel settled they tear our lives apart. Again.
The pre-approval is now a worthless piece of paper. There will be no house this year. There will be no pregnancy. There will only be another year of treading water.
It’s not all bad. We had been worrying about money. We had known that his job wasn’t terribly secure. We had been stressing out about the prospect of either having to rush the house-buying and moving, or pay astronomical rent for continuing our lease month-to-month indefinitely. All of this happening now made a lot of these decisions a lot easier. We’ll sign up for another year’s lease, keeping our rent payments down and giving us time to save up a bit more, find a more secure job for my sweetie, and work the timing out a bit better when next year – with any luck at all – we give all of this a shot again. It’s not the end of the world, and there’s even an obnoxious voice inside me that’s saying that perhaps this is all for the best.
It’s just crushingly disappointing. I so very much want to get out of this too-small apartment. I want to start our family. I want to have a real garden, where I can kill plants growing in real dirt instead of in a pot on my back patio. I want to be able to paint the walls, put in a funky tile backsplash, have a place that really feels like mine. Instead we get more money stress, more unemployment, more waiting.
I am so lucky in so many ways. I know that. I just thought things were finally going smoothly.
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1Carole
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 3:00
I’m sorry you’ve had this set back. I hope things get moving in the right direction for you guys really soon.
2Carrie
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 5:09
Sigh. I’m sorry. (You could do it like I do – fly by the seat of your pants, plan nothing, and then stress later when things blow up.
3Inky
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 5:39
That f-ing sucks. I swear life is driven by if it isn’t one thing, it’s another. I always feel like the other shoe is going to drop right on my head.
I’m really sorry, I hope it turns around for you both soon.
4claudia
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 6:12
My sympathies. Sending good-new-job-for-hubby karma.
5katie
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 6:21
Bummer. I hope Bradon is able to get a great stable job and you can set about making the rest of your dreams come true next year.
6Miriam
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 6:26
That sucks sweetie, but think of it as one more year to enjoy NOT having to mow your lawn, and NOT having to curtail all vacations because of a little nubbin who vomits on long trips.
7Debbie
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 9:40
Wow, talk about a rollercoaster ride. Here’s hoping Bradon finds something really great, really soon.
8Chris
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 10:55
Good luck to Bradon to find something quickly – it’ll help you save up money for a good down payment, right?!
9Lee Ann
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 12:25
Well, fuck. I’m sorry, darlin’. You’re a better woman than I to actually have the maybe-it’s-for-the-best voice somewhere in there…
Sending good job vibes your way. We’ve had some upheaval in that department around here, too, and we’re hoping the new direction will be a good one, but you never know in the software industry. Could be great, could be a complete balls-up. Here’s to Bradon finding something he really loves.
10Mouse
wrote on 26 June 2008 at 15:50
Sucksville. I’m sorry! Sending good job vibes your direction..
11Anne
wrote on 30 June 2008 at 18:10
Bastards.
When you guys have been married for 50 years, it won’t seem like much time, but for now, yuck. I’m so sorry.
12Kris
wrote on 1 July 2008 at 9:19
Well that truely sucks. But, if you were concerned about Brandon’s job not being stable, then it is better that you didn’t buy and have to worry about it after you signed the papers. Hopefully he will find something soon and you can get out of your lease before the end of it.
13sunflowerfairy
wrote on 1 July 2008 at 17:45
Everything happens for a reason. Stop beating yourself up over things you have no control over. (I mean that in the best way possible. Just so you know that.)
It sucks, but you and Bradon will handle it.
14Wanda
wrote on 5 July 2008 at 9:31
bummer about the job and I understand that you are ready to move on to the next step. But perhaps this is a journey you two need to take. I hope that Bradon finds a job that he truly loves and doesn’t ever return to the old employer. Good luck!